supposed to be Why sh*t happens but making it PG13 for tt.net LOL
RELIGION
Taoism
sh** happens.
Confucianism
Confucius say: sh** happens.
Buddhism
sh** happens, but it isn't really sh**.
Zen
What is the sound of sh** happening?
Hinduism
This sh** happened before.
Catholicism
sh** happens, and you deserve it.
Protestantism
Let sh** happen to someone else.
Judaism
Why does sh** always happen to us?
Agnosticism
What is this sh**?
Atheism
I don't believe that sh**.
Christian Science
This isn't sh**, and it isn't happening.
Jehovah's Witness
Let me in your house and I'll tell you why sh** happens.
PHILOSOPHY
Idealism
In a perfect world, sh** wouldn't happen.
Relativism
What's sh** for you may not happen to be sh** for me.
Realism
No matter what happens, sh** is still sh**.
Socrates
Nobody knows what sh**'s going to happen.
Plato
The idea of sh** happens to be more important than any particular piece of sh**.
Aristotle
sh** rolls downhill.
Descartes
I sh**, therefore I happen.
Immanuel Kant
We can never truly know sh**; we can only know the happening of sh**.
Bertrand Russell
Logically, "sh** happens" is an unproven proposition until the sh** and the happening are specified.
Postmodernism
"sh** happens" is just another form of discourse.
New Age
What sh** happened in your past lives?
SCIENCE
Relativity
How much sh** happens in a given time depends on your frame of reference.
Copenhagen Quantum Mechanics
sh** doesn't really happen until you smell it.
Many-Worlds Quantum Mechanics
All possible varieties of sh** happen.
Big Bang Cosmology
One piece of sh** happening is all it takes.
Steady-State Cosmology
sh** happens at the same rate forever.
Inflationary Cosmology
Boy, that sh** happened fast!
Cold Fusion
sh** can happen in my lab too!
Parapsychology
Guess what sh**'s going to happen next?
POLITICS
Liberalism
sh** always happens to the poor.
Conservatism
It so happens my sh** doesn't stink.
Libertarianism
Everyone has the right to have the sh** of their choice happen to them.
Capitalism
Whoever has the most sh** makes things happen.
Socialism
Everyone gets the same amount of sh**.
Communism
Nobody owns sh**.
Civil Disobedience
I'm going to sit right here until sh** happens.
Ronald Reagan
I don't recall that sh** happening...
Dan Quayle
Pshit hapens.
Ross Perot
Well, y'know, I'll tell ya, no matter what ya do, sh**'s gonna happen, y'understand?
Al Gore
sh** happened faster after I invented the Internet.
Donald Rumsfeld
There's the sh** you know is happening, the sh** you know that you don't know is happening, and the sh** you don't know that you don't know is happening.
Radical Feminism
sh** wouldn't happen if it weren't for men.
_________________ “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” --Steve Jobs
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